DVD Box Set

I will never understand this. I was in HMV with a few friends. We saw that they had all 5 seasons of Family Guy on DVD. They were £12.99 for seasons 1-4 and £17.99 for season 5.

But they also had a sign saying “Family GUY DVD Box Set Seasons 1-5. Ask at counter”

So off Duncan goes to ask how much it is, and we wander off to look at the other DVDs. He comes back later and says “£80″

What?!?

All four cost £69.95. So they’re charging an extra £10 to save you about half a centimeter of shelf space?

Hang on….£10 per half-centimeter? Isn’t that the same rate as wang enhancement surgery?

Nark!

I smell a nark.

Just installed Norton AntiVirus 2007, so on the turntable of emotions, side A is happy that I’m now protected for another year. Woo!

However side B is a little concerned. Not only did the software ask me to uninstall the “incompatible” firewall I was running (probably to try to presuade me to buy Norton’s), but it then:

a. Asked to connect to the Internet to verify it’s key WITHOUT a firewall in place. but also

b. Now constantly reminds me the the Windows Automatic Updates program is set to notify me of important updates but not automatically install them. It wants to automatically install them.

Problem a is SUICIDAL. Connecting to the Internet without a firewall is like leaving for work without locking the house. In addition, my firewall is perfectly compatible with Norton AntiVirus.

Problem b is a choice! Not a problem you nark! I choose to be notified and choose which updates to install, because mad as it may sound, I like to maintain a level of control over what is installed on my PC and when.

So in the words of Norman Stanley Fletcher in Porridge: ‘Naff off!’

I Think I’m The Rain Devil

Douglas Adams once wrote a character who was a rain god, but didn’t know it. Everywhere he went, it rained. All the rain wanted to do was follow him and rain on him.

Well, everywhere I go recently, it seems to stop raining. I got up today, and it was pishing it down outside. I put on my thick raincoat, and slipped on my waterproof over-trousers. As soon as I got outside, it stopped.

Then at work, it was raining all day. Except for the hour that I went out at lunch, and the half hour it took for me to walk home afterwards.

As soon as I got into a building today, it started pouring.

What’s up with that?

Is Rich Hall still funny?

I think the real question is: Was he ever funny?

I keep seeing him on QI, and he looks bored out of his skull.

The sort of ironic, sarcastic, dry humour went out of syle in the 80s. So why is he still pushing it?

Christmas Adverts

Every year they seem to arrive earlier and earlier.

This year, they were heralded by a kid running into shot with a white background, and he shouts

“It’s Chris-…”

“Oh you’d BETTER NOT BE….”

And then that song starts and the Asda logo comes into shot.

I HATE that song now. It seems to be used in every advert at Christmas. There’s seems to be only a limited amount of Christmas spirit to go around, and these adverts are sucking it all up.

Bring back Christmas! No adverts before December 1st.

Late Night TV Quizes

You know the ones. Simple looking question. Late night. Premium rate number.

Why is it always the fuckwits that get put through to the studio? Do you think this is a coincidence?

Let’s look at it. They make 75p per call, profit being about 50p. Per call. So if they give away the prize quickly, they make no money.

A typical question:

These cows go moo. Two cows go moo moo. 125 more cows make a huge moo. Imagine all those cows. Amoozing!
How many cows?

FOUR! It’s four for fuck’s sake!!! HOW HARD IS THIS?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Climate Change Sceptics!

Was reading an article about the politics in climate change science in America.

Ha! I think I’ve found my nomination for universe’s biggest douch-bag. But I’m not saying who. I’m not that stupid.

I’ve got one question for climate change sceptics, who don’t believe climate change is real (or that it’s not that bad):

Bet your life?

Tell you what. We’ll do nothing about climate change, we’ll keep using up this planet’s resources like there’s no tomorrow. And we’ll wait, 30 years. If climate change is real, we’ll have noticed by then. Of course, it’ll be too late, and I’ll have thrown you off a cliff, but at least we’ll know who’s right, and that’s all that matters isn’t it?

Oh? Sorry, stakes too high? Not willing to risk it?

The stop arsing about and quit risking my life!